Smells Like Mets Spirit: A musical tribute to Brodie Van Wagenen

Brodie Van Wagenen’s first year as the New York Mets General Manager was so colorful, it was worthy of a song parody. This is Smells Like Mets Spirit.

Who doesn’t enjoy a good song parody? Popularized by Weird Al Yankovic, Stephen Lynch, and many others with access to a rhyming dictionary, the art of turning a popular song into satire is one way to spread cheer and maybe humiliate a few people in the process. The 2019 New York Mets provided us with plenty of topics to satirize.

Specifically, it’s the way Brodie Van Wagenen’s first year as the Mets general manager which has me itching to parody. The season included some major oddities even though the end season record was actually pretty sweet.

The story of the 2019 Mets has been less about the on-field play and far more about the behind-the-scenes. From fights with reporters to flying furniture, it was as equally memorable away from the field as it was on.

Given this, I thought it was worth recapping the Mets season so far via song parody. I chose one of the most recognized songs from the 1990s, Nirvana’s “Smells Like Teen Spirit.” The song changed rock and roll and introduced a generation to the grunge movement of Seattle.

In case you’re unfamiliar, get out from the rock you’re living under and check out the memorable music video and appreciate the mostly vague lyrics. Then, go on and enjoy the lyrics Smells Like Mets Spirit.

Smells Like Mets Spirit

Load up on your ex-clients, sign them to multi-year deals
We’ll probably lose and you’ll pretend
The team has scored enough to make you self-assured
Oh no, this season has been absurd

Why Cano, Cano, Cano, he moves so slow
Cano, Cano, Cano, he must go
Cano, Cano, Cano, career has sunken low
Cano, Cano, Cano

Diaz was lights out, now he’s less dangerous
Come and get us, we signed some free agents
Outfield depth diluted, injuries are contagious
Come and get us, said the ex-agent
Wilson Ramos, where is Jed Lowrie, watching Jeurys Familia, is derogatory
Yeah, hey

You’re worse at what you do best
In season one you didn’t quite pass the test
This fan base has always been
Saying the owners need to more wisely spend

Not on Cano, Cano, Cano, he moves so slow
Cano, Cano, Cano, at least he can throw
Cano, Cano, Cano, want a trade veto
Cano, Cano, Cano

Vargas punches your lights out, his left fist is dangerous
Come and get us, we signed some free agents
It’s undisputed, bullpen meltdowns are contagious
Come and get us, said the ex-agent
Keon Broxton, no center fielder, after this season, I’ll need a breather
Yeah, hey

And I forget what it’s like to pennant chase
Oh yeah, I forget what it’s like to smile
I found it hard, it’s hard to find
Oh well, so what if our defense is not correctly aligned?

Didn’t need Cano, Cano, Cano, we had McNeil
Cano, Cano, Cano, his average is not a typo
Cano, Cano, Cano, his numbers are micro
Cano, Cano, Cano

Throw a chair then shout, show the coaches you’re dangerous
Come and get us, we signed some free agents
I feel stupid, losing seasons are contagious
Come and get us, said the ex-agent
Yoenis Cespedes, forever on injured list, Mickey Callaway, ignorance is bliss

In denial, in denial, in denial, in denial, in denial
In denial, in denial, in denial, in denial

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Thank you to the boys of Nirvana for making this song possible. And a special thank you to the crazy Mets season for the inspiration.